The Onion
has a hilarious letter from a lovestruck WoW player trying to call back their one true Night Elf, Helen.

When we met, I was looking for a group fit to take the Zul’Gurub instance. But as I stocked up on provisions at the convenience store before my quest, and our eyes locked, I realized that I was not looking for a group, I was looking for love, and I found it in you. You are the sun, the moon, the Cinderhide Armsplints of the Monkey. There is so much we have to offer one another. Unfailing loyalty, a Strength of 250, someone who can go out for snacks in the heat of battle. Can’t you see we’re made for each other?

…

Please, baby, if you leave, you will increase by 32 percent the chance of doing direct damage to my heart. Please reconsider.

THATS comedy.